Consult An Asshole In Person


Do you want a face to face interactive bitch slapping? You can call it a consultation if that makes you feel better. But if you are looking to feel better why are you even considering Consult An Asshole.

I’m not going to make you feel better. I’m going to tell you how to make yourself better.

You have to do the work. But I’m going to tell you what to do.

Do you want it in person so you can ask me questions & get clarification?

Consult An Asshole can do that.

If you are in or willing to travel to Fort Collins I’ll be happy to meet with you in person and explain how to lay the smackdown upon all your problems.

Smart people send their questions in advance so I can have some time to think it over – time you don’t have to pay for. But you can also wait until the session begins to present your problems. Who am I to tell you how to spend your money?

That’s a trick question. I’m an Asshole. That’s who I am. And yes, I might tell you how to spend your money if that’s one of the solutions to your problems.

Speaking of spending your money – here are the terms and conditions for an in-person consultation:

1. I pick the location. A bar or restaurant of my choice.

2. You pay for a 1 hour minimum consultation (that’s $100) cash. Up front.

3. You pay for my food and booze as consumed during the consultation.

You ask and I suggest shut up. It’s your hour, it’s your money. The less you attempt to justify and explain your past mistakes the more I can focus on killing off your future mistakes before they happen.

Contact me to schedule your session. A better future is available to those who can handle the truth.

You can handle the truth can’t you?